Politically-Correct Parenting

I am NOT a politically-correct mother. I discriminate based on age and gender and whether or not you’ve finished your homework. (For example, those who have, may go out and play.) I insist that girls wear dresses and boys wear ties to special occasions. I teach my girls to cook and sew, and my boys to dig ditches and mow lawns. If you are older, you may have privileges younger siblings don’t enjoy, like staying up late or watching particular movies. We also pray before every meal, even if our non-church-going friends are visiting. And, we celebrate Christmas. So, as you can see, I’m not politically correct. In fact, you could say I’m a bit old-fashioned in values and in parenting.

Despite my outdated philosophies, I surprisingly have experienced some success as a mother. My children are happy and well adjusted, and are already making meaningful contributions to society. This is by no means a perfection declaration. I am still at the beginning of my motherhood journey. However, I can’t help thinking about parenting methods as I observe present politics.

The age-old (yet very current) question in society seems to be whether or not there is right and wrong in the world. Can anything be absolute? Like truth? Or must we simply disregard foundational boundaries so that everyone can feel “included.” I can only state my opinion. Yes. Some things are black or white. True or false. Right or wrong. In fact, I believe that believing in truth actually leads to a happy and fulfilling life. Truth provides a foundation for success.

Yep, I’m the naïve, old-fashioned mother who feels that rules are important; that children who are held accountable are actually happier. Therefore, I generally require that my children toe the line, do their chores, don’t talk back, be kind to each other, get to bed, to meals and to school on time, and sit reverently at church. My experience has been that a little bit of “strict” can lead to a lot of success. Could “toeing the line,” “being kind to one another” and “attending church” help our nation? I believe so.

Additionally, I believe in a mother’s uncanny sense of right and wrong. When my 7-year-old son offered to trade me five of my real dollars for one of his toy bills, I said, “No.” When he told me I no longer needed to check his homework (he was sure he was old enough to sign the parent signature), I smiled and said I would keep doing my job. When two of my children quarreled, I didn’t offer to re-write our family standards, I just kindly upheld them. I’m not a mean mother, just a wise woman. I’ve been around the block a bit (as far as children are concerned), and I can smell something fishy a mile away. I can’t help but wonder what would happen if this parenting philosophy were practiced not just in our homes, but in Washington D.C.

I also believe in work. (I know, old-fashioned.) This is the land of the free, and freedom has brought abundance. America is full of beautiful lands, beautiful homes, thriving cities and endless opportunities. Do we realize how lucky we are? When my teenagers head out on their new bikes to meet up with friends, I smile at our situation. When my well-fed children play until after dark with good neighborhood children, I am grateful. When we sleep in endlessly on summer mornings, I enjoy every quiet minute. And when I can afford several kinds of ice cream at the grocery store, I giggle with delight. But, life can’t be one stream of pleasure and personal satisfaction. Indeed, our present state of abundance has led to an unprecedented amount of apathy. Thankfully, this uncouth mother can combat laziness. I can still provide a garden to weed, bedrooms to be cleaned and even (gasp!) green beans that must be finished before dessert. I want my children to enjoy this abundant land to the fullest — not because it comes at no cost, but because they have earned it and can truly appreciate it.

It’s often difficult to uphold “discriminating” standards in a home. Being politically incorrect is hard, especially when I have to play bad cop. But guess what? The sun follows the storm. After a busy Saturday spent mopping floors, dusting shelves and getting the work done, our family is the happiest. When we hold our children to a standard of honesty and respect, they later hug us with joy. Once we’ve broached a sensitive topic with our children, yet assured them of our love and support, we feel peace.

Nope, political correctness has no place in my parenting style. Right and wrong, and black and white are still legitimate concepts in our home. I am not here to make people “feel good” by erasing standards, but to help my children “feel joy” by maintaining principles — even old-fashioned ones. I believe our nation could thrive with the same attitude. Time will tell whether or not my principles and practices have been correct — not politically correct, but parenting correct.